Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Pass the hummus

Dear French people,

I had wanted to specialize in classical and contemporary French cuisine because one of my Big Dreams was to live in Paris and cook there for a living. You were, after all, the people who invented professional cooking, and what better way to become a master than to be in the heart of all the action?

As my education in the culinary arts progresses, however, I am discovering that you use horrifying amounts of cream, butter and eggs, in spite of claims to the contrary that your womenfolk are not fat.

You might admonish me by flashing your moderation cop's badge. But tell me, how can one be moderate in the face of all that luxurious creaminess? Knowing myself, I will probably have scarfed it all down before you can say pâte à choux. Besides, if I taste food for a living, all those little buttery morsels will eventually creep into my arteries.

Perhaps you might want to send over one of the disciples of your kitchens to disabuse me of this notion. 'Til then I have decided, until further notice, that my personal cooking and eating philosophies would be better served by Mediterranean cuisine.

Xoxo (with many libations of extra-virgin olive oil),
LL

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